Derek Johnson Muses

In the end of it, I was laughing so hard, I swear that I was in a college dorm room.

I was haging out with my friend Tom in the apartment of his friends Heidi, Naomi, and Laura, along with Heidi’s sister Emily. Tom’s roommate Dale and friend Bryce were along for what would be a very intriguing ride.

The night began innocently enough, with Heidi giving us one of her subtle psychology quizzes. Then she and Emily made things interesting and brought a jar of mayonnaise and graham crackers in the room. The girls began dipping the crackers into the mayo, and eating them, much to our collective dismay.

Naturally, I found this disgusting, given that I’ve never had a taste for odd food combination, such as peanut butter and mayonnaise sandwiches. But I felt a bit game, so I took a bit of graham cracker and swept up a bit of mayo on it. It tasted innocuous so I tried another one with a bit more on it. The flavors didn’t mesh very well. I tried one more with just a little, and it seemed fine, although I asserted the blend wasn’t perfect. I did it a couple more times, just so people couldn’t say I was coward.

By now, the attitude in the room was getting rowdy. Heidi had attempted to feed Tom a cracker chucked full of mayo, but both he and Dale refused. Bryce and I had gamely tried it. Upping the ante, the girls tried eating full spoonfuls off a big wooden spoon, wincing as they did so. I told them it would be easier to just chuck the spoon done without thinking. (Speaking from personal experience gained off a blender drinking dare in high school.)

But after Naomi choked down a glob and Heidi asserted she was going to be sick, they asked of we would believe that it was all just white chocolate pudding. They brought in the empty boxes to prove their ruse, and I tried the “mayo” again, trying to figure out why I hadn’t realized it when I tried it.

This was one of the odder experiences I’ve had in the last couple of years, mainly because, in high school and college, I was often the guy who didn’t get the joke and was on the fringes. To do this day, I still look around when people laugh, expecting to have done something embarrassing by accident. But this experience reminded of what I love about people, that they are capable of such great “creativity”, and life is about unexpected joys. This certainly counted.